Choice Potential Blog

The Dark Glass

Oct 20, 2021 | Uncategorized | 0 comments

1 Corinthians 13:12 NIV

Now we see things imperfectly, like puzzling reflections in a mirror, but then we will see everything with perfect clarity. All that I know now is partial and incomplete, but then I will know everything completely, just as God now knows me completely.
This was a verse in my devotional recently. It struck me as a mystery and I knew I needed to research what this verse means. I'm wondering what it's like to "know everything completely" according to this Bible verse above. The mystery of what things I will see perfectly is something I ponder often. What mysteries will unfold in Eternity? The answers are limitless and different for everyone.
 
I know who I want to see, and hope they are there (did I do enough to reach them with the message of Jesus Love?). I can't wait to see both sets of my grandparents, ones I knew well and ones I never met. My Mom and brother, my favorite uncle and some good friends are all at the top of the list.
 
Lately I have been missing my mom who passed away in February of 2020. I have often wondered about the sights she sees in eternity. She was a lovely, Godly woman and losing her left a huge hole in our family. She was everyone's moral and spiritual compass and was always available with her amazing iced tea and hugs. For me, she was the woman who helped me raise my 2 children while I was a single mom, the person who never judged my decisions, be they bad or good, and always loved me no matter how ugly I was. She was my best friend, protector, defender and rock.
 
At her funeral the admiration and love given was overwhelming. She touched so many people and had a significant impact on the spiritual life of most people she knew. Spending a precious week with her before she passed was a real gift. She wasn't sick and was clear minded until her last few days. She knew what was going on. She knew it was the end of her life here on earth. She had moments of uncertainty a few days before she left. She voiced her concern to me and we talked about it.
 

"I'm feeling a little scared", she said.

"Why do you feel afraid? You will be in Eternity and the Presence of God? Can you even imagine what the music will be like?"

"I'm going to miss my two ladies". That is what she called my sister and I; her two ladies. 🙂

"Well what can I do to help you Mom?"

"I don't know...I just feel anxious". At the end of life, hospice told us that anxiety rises and that is one reason they give anti-anxiety medication.

"How about we listen to some music? Some Glenn Miller?"

"No, I was listening to that all day." I just don't know."

"How about I pick some good Gospel songs and surprise you?"

"OK, that sounds good."

 
I was raised listening to Southern Gospel music like The Bill Gaither Trio, Dotty Rambo, The Blackwood Brothers and so on. She and my Dad used to harmonize in the car and sing along to every song. I always thought it was boring but eventually these songs made their way into my memory and I secretly sang along. I'm a sucker for a good 3 part harmony.
 
I pulled out my phone and went on the music app to find some songs to lift her spirits. After a few songs, she started to calm and sing along a bit. My mother had a beautiful soprano voice, which had weakened with age but was still sweet. She was also a classically trained pianist and song writer. What a wonderfully creative person she was. Now she was weak and frail; the complete opposite of who she used to be. I just wanted to drink her up for as long as possible so we sat in her dim room talking and listening to music for a few hours.
 

Then it happened...she lifted her hands and was singing with a much stronger voice.

She had tears running down her cheeks and a wonderful peace filled the room. As the song came to a conclusion, she looked at me and said that was just what she needed. The song that broke the fear was "I Bowed On My Knees (And Cried Holy)" which provides a very powerful image of heaven. Let me tell you that WE HAD SOME CHURCH in the little pink bedroom! The presence of God was thick in the air and I realized in that moment that I had just seen a glimpse of the 'perfect clarity' that Eternity with Jesus will bring. Peace, joy, rest and life all in a flash of my Mothers sweet face.

She then told me she was tired and ready for bed. As we finished her night time routine, I asked her if after our music party had helped in anyway.

 
"So after all that amazing worship, do you really think you will miss us?", I asked.
 
She answered "No, probably not".
 
We laughed and I kissed her good night. A few days later she fell asleep for good and now that perfect clarity of Eternity is hers. When she was a child she CHOSE Jesus as her Savior, and passed that legacy down to her children and grandchildren. I have CHOSEN continue this legacy and to do my best to keep it going until His return.
 

Yet I still wonder:

  • What does she see?
  • Who does she see?
  • Does she play piano?
  • Did she see Jesus?
  • Does she understand everything about her earthly life now?
  • Does she miss us?
  • What does her mansion look like?
  • What is the music like?
  • Can she see us?
  • Is there a beach?
  • Is there food in Heaven?

I try to get an idea in my finite mind about what her eternal life is like, but I know I cannot begin to comprehend any of it.

Nevertheless, I look forward to that day when I will see completely; face to face with my Savior Jesus. All of my questions will then be answered. Until then I have peace that God already knows me COMPLETELY, and someday I will dwell in His House forever.

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